Here are my first impressions on this year's competitors in the Eurovision Song Contest. These songs will be the last eight to perform in the First Semi Final on Tuesday 25th May.
Belgium 78/100
Cute and simple. Despite all the stick he comes in for, James Blunt sells records, and this Belgian Blunt-alikee should qualify for the Final. This is the sort of simple straightforward and well sung song that you think you've already heard somewhere else which sometimes comes through to take a win. That said, the last solo guy with a guitar was James Fox for the UK in 2004 and he came 19th.
Malta 22/100
A thirsty continent is glad of the opportunity to go and put the kettle on. Talking of something you think you've already heard somewhere before, this song has been Malta's entry every third year since 1994. By God, they'll KEEP entering it until we give them the win as well. Next year a duet and the year after a perky pop number, with Chiara pencilled in for a return in 2013. Try something new Malta.
Albania 85/100
Albania has a well populated world of 'Feisty Pop Belters'. They have hit on a formula to qualify for the Final and this song is in a tradition of upbeat hi energy pop floor fillers. The stage performance will be everything for this track and if this gets 'sold' on the night, an each way bet at 66/1 could yield a tidy return.
Greece 61/100
This song shows that the choice of lead singer is everything. If Elena Paparizou was leading this track, it would be a contender to win. Giorgos Alkaios does not have the same smouldering appeal, and first impressions make me think of SAGAPO. By the end of course I'm thinking that some dolmades and a bit of plate smashing wouldn't go amiss. The Final would be a bleaker place without this song. Fun.
Portugal are thinking carefully about what wins this Contest, having made the final twice in the last two years. This year, think Portuguese Jade Ewen. This Fado Torch Song is exactly the type of tune which was a guaranteed winner throughout the late 80s to mid 90s. Can it do enough to beat the 7th place, which is Portugal's best ever showing in 44 attempts?
Macedonia 4/100
Dull
This song ticks many many Eurovision boxes. A soaring, anthemic message ballad, delivered by a group of strong jawed guys and wistful women. But this means nothing. Think Switzerland 2006. Strong favourites to win in that year, Switzerland did not even qualify for the Final.
Iceland 58/100
If Iceland can afford to pay the entry fee for the Eurovision Song Contest, they can afford to pay our savers back the money they lost from their Ponzi Banks. I'm just saying. As for the song itself, well Iceland have entered this kind of song for the last few years. Strong enough to qualify for the Final, but weak and formulaic enough to come in the bottom 5.
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